List of fictional South Park species
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The South Park television series includes a number of elements from science fiction, fantasy, and folklore despite its contemporary theme. This includes aliens, mechanical beings, and scientific experiments.
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[edit] Crab People
The Crab People are evidently evil beings, given that their appearance is emphasised by the Crab People Song, a dark and ominous leitmotif: "Cra-a-ab people, cra-a-ab people, taste like crab, talk like people." They were banished beneath the Earth's crust a thousand years ago during the Kindling Wars.
They are a species of what appears to be mutant crab. They are crabs that stand about four feet tall and speak English.
[edit] Plan for world domination
Crab people want domination of the world, but are too weak and small to destroy or take down man by force. So the crab people created an ingenious way to take down man: turn all men into metrosexuals. As one crab person said, "If you can't beat man, change man". By changing men into metrosexuals, man would be too weak and "gay" to beat the crab people. They went about achieving this goal by dressing up as the five men from Queer Eye for the Straight Guy. At the episode's conclusion, it was revealed that the Crab People had previously attempted a takeover of North America in the 1970s, using The Jeffersons.
[edit] Appearances
Other than the episode "South Park Is Gay!", the Crab People are also mentioned briefly in "Quest for Ratings", when the boys and their friends are trying to come up with ideas for school TV shows. Cartman suggests doing a show about Crab People, to which Stan replies, "I think we can do a little better than Crab People". Later, in "Two Days Before the Day After Tomorrow", Crab People are the most ridiculous suggestion as to who caused the Beaverton flood (a reference to Hurricane Katrina).
Matt Stone mentioned in an interview once that crab people are an "inside joke" between the staff. It is often mentioned as a reference to what results when the staff procrastinates on an episode. Matt Stone and Trey Parker originally put the crab people in as a placeholder when they were making the episode. As the time before airing ran out, they became more "desperate" and decided to leave the crab people in.
[edit] Gelgameks
The Gelgameks are greenish creatures from another planet resembling vaginas turned upside down.
In the episode "Red Hot Catholic Love", they were represented at the Vatican, where a collection of priests, bishops and cardinals are discussing the priest sex abuse scandal, which is fully known of and accepted by all Catholic priests (except Father Maxi, the priest from South Park). The head of the Gelgamek Catholics angrily objects to Maxi's suggestion of allowing priests to have sex with women so as to not encourage molestation, saying "The Gelgamek vagina is three feet wide and filled with razor-sharp teeth! Do you really expect us to have sex with them?" in "Cancelled" The visitors mention one of their most popular shows "Who wants to marry a gelgamek"
[edit] Genetic experiments
Dr. Alphonse Mephisto has been known to create a number of genetic experiments; however, most of these experiments involve giving an existing animal multiple asses.
Some of his experiments include:
- A macrocephalic clone of Stan
- Genetically engineered man-killing turkeys
- Kevin, an experiment to create the perfect pop star, a clone of Michael Jackson that was birthed by a llama. The story of Mephisto and Kevin is explained in the Primus song of the same name that was made for the Chef Aid album and episode. Note that Mephisto is not Kevin's creator, just his guardian.
- Bunnyfish. (Although the boys note that these are simply fish with fake bunny ears tied to them)
- A gorilla spliced with a mosquito.
- A rat spliced with a duck.
- Swiss cheese spliced with chalk and a fake beard (which is just all three items in the same tank).
- A pig spliced with an elephant that turned into a pig with Mr Garrison's face. (This was actually the result of the boys having a pig and elephant interbreed, after Mephisto explained to them that pig and elephant DNA "just won't splice". The fact that the offspring has Mr. Garrison's face implies that he, and not the elephant, is its father.)
- A squirrel spliced with a piece of provolone cheese.
- A monkey, ostrich and mongoose, all with four asses.
- A 5-Assed Monkey
- A 7-Assed Turtle
[edit] Goobacks
Goobacks are actually humans, a race from the year 3045 who have traveled in a one-way time portal back to present-day South Park to find work. They are a "hairless, uniform mix of all races" with an orangish skin color, and their language is also mixed from all world languages.
The episode "Goobacks" is a satirical episode on the current illegal immigration problem in the United States. The term "gooback" is a play on the racial slur "wetback". The name comes from the strange purple "goo" that covers those who have traveled back in time. The Goobacks, similar to the Mexicans, are the subject of backlash because they are immigrants who take the work from local residents by offering to work below minimum wage. To try and get rid of them all, the men in South Park have a gay orgy in an attempt to stop them from ever being born. Eventually, the residents of South Park realize that to get rid of the Goobacks from the present day, they have to create a better future. However, they soon go back to the gay orgy man pile after deciding that the montage where they are seen making the world a better place is even more gay than the huge gay sex orgy.
[edit] Jakovasaurs
Jakov and Junjun (the latter renamed "Hope" by the Mayor) were the only known living pair of an extremely rare species known as the Jakovasaurs (pronounced "Jack-off-a-saurs"). They resemble a cross between a human being and a rubber chicken, and at first possess linguistic patterns similar to those of Gungans. Junjun (pronounced "June-June") is a parody of the Star Wars character Jar Jar Binks. Though arguably good natured, the loud and obnoxious Jakovasaurs are universally despised by the residents of South Park, with the exception of Eric Cartman, who finds their moronic slapstick antics to be downright hilarious, and their personalities completely likeable; Kyle speculates this may be because they are the only creatures as annoying as he is. The pair and their offspring were eventually tricked into relocating to France, where their Jerry Lewis-esque behavior was much more appreciated.
[edit] Joozians
The Joozians are a fictional alien species who appeared in the episode "Cancelled."
As their name suggests, the Joozians are parodies of Jewish people. Though they have green skin, some of their features (for example, giant noses) are parodies of those stereotypically ascribed to Jews, and their voices and language seem similar to those of the Yiddish language. Their wide ears cause their heads to be shaped like the Star of David. Their cuisine is also similar to Jewish food, and when Kyle shows appreciation for it is remarked that he probably has Joozian ancestry ("Tell us about it", Cartman mutters). This may imply that all Jewish people are supposed to be descended from Joozians, since this episode indicates that different human races are actually different alien species.
According to South Park, the Joozians are in control of all media in the Universe, meant to spoof what some conspiracy theorists think about Jews on Earth. In the episode, the South Park boys must try to dissuade the two Joozians in charge of the alien reality show Earth from cancelling (and destroying) the world. They do so by blackmailing the aliens with pictures of them engaging in homosexual acts.
[edit] Lice
In the episode "Lice Capades" we are brought into the world of the lice that live in the hair of the children of South Park, specifically Clyde's. The group of lice are led by a president and vice president. After the lice are discovered by the school nurse, the kids are sent to the doctor and given RidX Shampoo to kill them off. Most of the race perish because of the shampoo and the blow dryer that are used, but one louse, Travis, is able to escape on a fly's leg at the end, with his baby, Hope, in his arms. They travel to a new "planet" of hair with an advanced civilization of lice that claims to have survived there for generations without being disturbed. When the camera zooms out we discover that this place is in fact Angelina Jolie's pubic hair, implying that she has pubic lice or "crabs."
[edit] ManBearPig
ManBearPig or MBP as referred in the sixth episode of the 10th season named after the animal. A ManBearPig, as described by Al Gore, is a "Half man/half bear/half pig" terror, despite the apparent impossibility of such a creature. In the episode, Al Gore is on a mission to rid the world of ManBearPig and to do so the boys reluctantly agree to help.
The hunt for ManBearPig satirizes Al Gore's fight for perceived global warming awareness. At the end of the episode, when he says he wants to make a movie starring himself about a subject other than "MBP" (ManBearPig) it refers to the independent movie An Inconvenient Truth that opened on May 24, 2006.
In the episode, it is never indicated that ManBearPig actually exists, and seems in fact to be in Al Gore's head.
It later turns out that Al Gore in fact did make up ManBearPig, since the creature appears in the season 11 episode Imaginationland Episode II. In the episode exists a dimension called Imaginationland where every creature humans have ever made up actually exist, and among the evil creatures made up is ManBearPig. In this episode he is slightly more muscular and menacing than Al Gore's interpretation, and even speaks a few lines. He kills several people and kills Kyle (even though he is revived) before being sucked back into the dimension. He appears again in the next episode, Imaginationland Episode III, on a tape made by Al Gore. Gore, wanting ManBearPig dead, nukes Imaginationland (which recovers).
[edit] Marklar
The Marklars are a fictional, secular alien race that appear in several episodes. The word marklar is also a generic word used by the Marklars, similar to smurf.
In the South Park episode "Starvin' Marvin in Space" much of the action involves the Marklars, who use the word "marklar" to represent the meaning of any noun, including proper nouns. The Marklars say that on the planet Marklar, every person, place, or thing is referred to as "Marklar". For example, all Marklars are named Marklar, and everything on the planet Marklar (or the "marklar Marklar") is also called Marklar. Similar techniques have been previously used by other fictional races: notably the Smurfs, who only applied the word "smurf" to verbs and adjectives, the Mr. Saturn race of EarthBound, who were all called Mr. Saturn except for Dr. Saturn, and the underground creatures of Pierre Berton's children's book "The Secret World of Og", who applied the word "og" to all words, with the exception of mathematical operators.
Physically, the Marklar are humanoids. They are a generally friendly race, in that they allowed the starving Ethiopians to move to their planet. They were seen briefly in another episode, "The Red Badge of Gayness", and were mentioned in the episode "Cancelled", where it was revealed that they hate the unnamed aliens from the Horsehead Nebula. They were also shown in the retelling of the story of Xenu in the episode "Trapped in the Closet" as victims of Xenu's evil plan.
[edit] Quotations
- On being welcomed to the planet, Marklar (the leader of the Marklars) said: Greetings, Marklar! I am Marklar! This is Marklar.
- Kyle: Marklar, these marklars want to change your marklar. They don't want this Marklar or any of his marklars to live here because it's bad for their marklar. They use Marklar to try and force marklars to believe their marklar. If you let them stay here, they will build marklars and marklars. They will take all your marklars and replace them with their marklar. These marklars have no good marklar to live on Marklar, so they must come here to Marklar. Please, let these marklars stay where they can grow and prosper without any marklars, marklars, or marklars.
- Marklar: Young marklar, your marklars are wise and true.
[edit] Scuzzlebutt
Scuzzlebutt was a creature that Eric Cartman originally made up in a campfire story in the episode "Volcano". According to the story, he lives on the mountain and kills anyone who dares to climb to the top, because he likes the taste of blood and likes to add pieces to his deformed body. He has a piece of celery for one of his hands and one of his legs is replaced with Patrick Duffy. He weaves wicker baskets as a hobby. To Cartman's surprise, the creature was real. Scuzzlebutt saved the day by helping Cartman, Kyle, Stan, Jimbo and Ned cross a river of lava. Kenny was hit by the lava rock and died on the other side of the lava river.
Following his heroics, Scuzzlebutt was shot in the head by Stan Marsh. Stan did this because he was under pressure by his Uncle Jimbo to hunt and kill any animal he saw. Afterwards, Jimbo said, "Stan, some things you kill, and some things you don't. See?" To which Stan replies, "No."
An alternate version of Scuzzlebutt was featured in "City on the Edge of Forever". Instead of Patrick Duffy, this Scuzzlebutt has Brent Musburger for a leg, and instead of wicker baskets, he makes ice cream (ice cream was a running joke in the episode).
The name "Scuzzlebutt" is a play on the word "scuttlebutt", a slang term for gossip.
[edit] Towelie (Genetically Modified Towels)
Genetically Modified Towels were a creation of the United States Military, whose goal was to make a new weapon in the labs of a secret government base. Or they were created as super-advanced drying devices. Or as part of an alien plot. Many explanations are given, none of which interest the boys, because they simply want their "Okama Gamesphere" back. The generally accepted explanation is that all (or possibly none) are true. Another more evil towel is also featured but dies. See information at Towelie.
[edit] Underpants Gnomes
The Underpants Gnomes are small, dwarf-like race which lives in a cave under one of the trees in the town. The Gnomes appeared first in the episode Gnomes, where they steal underwear from people in the town. In episode Red Sleigh Down it appears that during two months of the year they help Santa.
The gnomes actually acknowledge and are concerned over Kenny's (somewhat inevitable) death, a rare occurrence among South Park characters.
The Underpants Gnomes defend their theft of underwear by outlining a three step plan:
- Step 1: Collect underpants
- Step 2: ???
- Step 3: Profit!
[edit] Visitors
The traditional "grey" aliens with black eyes, they first appear in the show's pilot episode, Cartman Gets an Anal Probe, after, appropriately enough, giving Cartman an anal probe. They are seen in many subsequent episodes, including Cartman's Mom is Still a Dirty Slut, and The Red Badge of Gayness, or Summer Sucks in the first swimming pool scene. They also appear as workers at an intergalactic TV studio in Cancelled.
A visitor appears in every episode, in the opening. They regard cows as the most intelligent animal on Earth and can communicate with them readily. Their cattle mutilation on which the cows questioned them was put down to 'new guy' alien Karl's inexperience. However, in the opening to the first couple seasons, visitors are seen having a barbecue in the top left of the screen. This is a reference to a scene which appeared in the pilot but which was deleted when it was remade into the Anal Probe episode. At the end of the pilot, Barbrady is looking for the escaped herd and stops by the side of the road, where the aliens are having a barbecue, and asks if they've seen the cows. The audience is left to infer that they are nowhere to be found because they're being eaten by the aliens.
In the episode Bloody Mary when Stan's father is attempting to drive a car without a license to go see the statue of Mary, Stan starts arguing with him. During this conversation in the frame where Stan's father says: "They say her divine assblood has miraculous healing power" you can faintly see a visitor, although translucent, behind the car on the far right of the screen. This also happened in the episode "Roger Ebert Should Lay Off the Fatty Foods", "Jared Has Aides", "Asspen" and "The Biggest Douche in the Universe". In Merry Christmas, Charlie Manson!, Manson gets a tattoo of a smiley face, but during the chase scene, it appears to be a visitor's face.
In the school cafeteria is a poster saying, "Have you seen me?" with the face of a visitor.
[edit] Woodland Christmas Critters
The Woodland Christmas Critters are small talking animals that inhabit the forest, worship Satan, and are constantly preparing for the birth of their Savior, the Antichrist. The only creatures that are capable of preventing the birth of the Antichrist are mountain lions.
They appeared as creations of a Christmas story written by Eric Cartman in the episode "Woodland Critter Christmas." They later appeared with various evil imaginary creatures in the Imaginationland trilogy. They eventually rape Kurt Russell and his battalion. Russell was brought in to fight the evil imaginary creatures because, as one of the government officials states "[He was] in that one movie that was kinda like this." Jason Voorhees, in contemplating the creatures, remarked, "Man, I do not want to meet the kid that dreamt those things up!"
[edit] Giant Beetle
Fictional gigantic beetle that appered in episode "Rainforest Schmainforest".It was seen a few times sitting on a backpacok of Miss Stevens. Finally it gets killed by the group of forest workers.
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