User talk:Jlahori

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[edit] Stellar School System

You asked for my opinion on how to improve the article, so here are my suggestions:

• General: Remember, Wikipedia is an encyclopedia, and as such all material should be written from a neutral point of view. "Peacock words" like "eminent", "most distinguished" and "renowned" should be avoided in favor of a "just the facts" approach.
• Advisory Board section: Not necessary, should be deleted entirely.
• "The idea behind Stellar" section: should be retitled and rewritten for neutrality.
• Curriculum section: Seems unnecessary. The notion that this school represents a departure from existing educational norms in Pakistan is made clear elsewhere, making this section somewhat redundant.
• Open houses and Carnivals: Irrelevant, should be deleted.
• Stellar Management: Unnecessary, should be deleted.

I hope this helps. To be fair, my activity on Wikipedia is focused more on fighting vandalism than on detailed editing of existing articles, so there are better people to ask than me. Still, I'll be happy to answer further questions. Thanks. --Finngall ^talk 15:52, 21 April 2008 (UTC)