The Stoned Age

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The Stöned Age
Directed by James Melkonian
Produced by David Heyman
Neal H. Moritz
Written by James Melkonian
Rich Wilkes
Starring Michael Kopelow
Bradford Tatum
Clifton Collins Jr.
Renee Griffin
Distributed by Lion's Gate
Release date(s) 1994
Running time 95 min.
Language English
IMDb profile

The Stöned Age (also known as 'Tack's Chicks') is a 1994 American movie directed by James Melkonian, set during the 1970s. The movie is about two long haired teenagers named Michael Hubbs and Joe Connolly and a night out of their life of cruising Southern California looking for alcohol and girls.

Contents

[edit] Plot summary

The movie begins on a busy highway. A tall man with long hair in his early twenties, Crump's Brother, is hitchhiking. He is picked up by another long haired similarly aged man in a pickup. In the pick-up Crump's brother acts very aggressive towards the driver and tells him about two girls he knows about on Torrance Beach that he is going to spend the night with. The next scene is the driver surrounded by other young males in a front yard of a suburban house telling them about the two girls Crump's Brother told him about. One of the young males, Tack, walks away from the others, determined to spend the night with the two girls he has just heard about.

The movie then goes to the title sequence where we meet Michael Hubbs and Joe Connelly who are out driving around in their car "The Blue Torpedo" looking for girls when they pass a guy named Tack, whom they think is a loser. After Joe spits at him (at the urging of Hubbs), Tack yells out "I got some chicks!", so Hubbs backs up and they let Tack get into the car. Tack tells them he has a "shitload" of fine chicks staying near "that Frankie Avalon place."

After going to pay for gas and cigarettes, Hubbs and Connolly talk to the clerk, who happens to be Crump. Crump tells them about two "radical chicks" his brother has up in Torrance Beach (who are also) near "that Frankie Avalon place." Crump tells them that it's a closed party, because there are only two girls there. They lie to Crump and tell him that a girl named Desiree Gibson (whom Crump's brother likes) is doing "amateur night" at Dirty Doug's Strip Club. They end up telling Tack to get out and wash their windows and then leave him at the gas station after finding out 'Tack's chicks' are really 'Crump's brother's chicks'.

Hubbs and Joe arrive at the girls' house, but decide that only one of them; a girl named Lanie (who looks "just like that chick from the Virgin Killer album") is actually "fine". Lanie won't let them in to party unless they bring some 151.

So Hubbs and Joe go to Liquor World, sneak a bottle of 151 past the crazy disco guy clerk (played by Taylor Negron) and two inept Barney Fife-ish cops, and return to her house. Tack later ends up arriving with his nerdy friend "Snot-Rag" and almost costs Hubbs and Joe to lose the women by taking them to a party in Palos Verdes.

After getting the women back home, Hubbs and Lanie have sex while Joe is stuck talking to her much less attractive friend, Jill.

Joe and Jill go for a walk, and when they return find Tack and a gang of horny guys carrying cases of Ox 45 talls they stole from a warehouse outside Jill's house. Tack calls Jill a fat-ass and the guys all beat up Joe. Jill helps Joe get back into the house and then Crump's brother shows up.

Crump's brother beats down all of the guys outside, then tries to get inside the house, Joe and Hubbs are able to keep him out for a while. But just when it looks like he is about to get inside, Jill's father Warren (played by David Groh) shows up and beats him up. Hubbs and Joe try to get out of the house before Warren has them arrested, but only Hubbs is able to escape at first. Warren calls the police, and Joe is finally able to escape (after hearing a lecture about "all that heavy metal music"). Joe sneaks a kiss from Jill, and asks for her last name, so he can look her up to call her afterwards, which might never happen since her last name is Wajakawakawitz.

[edit] Trivia

  • The producers initially titled it Tack's Chicks and then Teenage Wasteland, before settling on The Stöned Age.
  • In the original script, Joe Connolly was going to be a big fan of The Who; but due to legalities, Blue Öyster Cult was used instead.
  • Originally the script called for the guys to drink Colt 45. However, the Colt 45 company refused to allow it because they don't endorse under-age drinking. So the producers made up the brand Ox 45, and used it instead.
  • Hubbs and Tack both say Lanie looks like "the chick from the Virgin Killer album." That is a reference to the Virgin Killer record by the Scorpions which originally featured a naked blond girl on the cover.
  • The movie is filled with anachronism, which are probably unintentional. For instance at many points during the movie when the scene takes place near a busy road cars from the 1980s and 1990s are clearly visible. There is also a point in the movie where a sign for the crafts store Michaels, which didn't exist until 1984, is also clearly visible. There are also many other instances of things that didn't exist in the 1970s being clearly visible. This can probably be attributed to the films overall low budget.
  • Despite being titled The Stöned Age (Stoned is a euphemism for marijuana intoxication) marijuana plays an almost insignificant role in the film. It is only smoked once in the whole movie by Jill and Joe. Also the quality of the marijuana, which is referred to as "skank weed", and the way the characters smoke it, out of a beer can, is extremely low quality unorthodox making the title even more inappropriate.

[edit] Cast

[edit] Soundtrack

[edit] Quotes

  • Hubbs (to Joe): Ever since you got hit by that laser at that Blue Öyster Cult show you've been acting like a pussy!
  • Buffalo Chick #1: It's a party.
Joe: Who's it gonna be, just you chicks?
Buffalo Chick #1: Yeah. We could play... submarine.
Hubbs: Actually, ladies we gotta get going.
Buffalo Chick #2: Where are you going?
Hubbs: Just cruisin' man.
  • Jill: This guy kinda reminds me of Mondo Man.
Lanie: Yeah kind of.
Joe: Who the fuck is Mondo Man?
Jill: Oh, he's just some dude.
  • Tack: Bring on the bitches!
(Lanie walks in)
Tack: Oh shit, I'm gonna scorch my shorts!
  • Joe (to Jill's dad after he comes home and catches the guys at his house): Nothing happened, man. She didn't even give me head.
  • Jill's Dad: Where do you get your values? From that stinking heavy metal music you listen to day and night?
Joe: Yeah, that's it, man. It's all the music! You know everything is just fine until we just listen to a couple of heavy metal albums. Then we get all fucked up!
  • Hubbs (to Joe): You snooze, you lose!!
  • Hubbs (to Joe): You're not playing that pussy shit in the Blue Torpedo!
  • Snot-Rag's Mother: Don't eat too many hot-dogs!
  • Tack: You'd rather watch The Dukes of Hazzard instead of getting laid?
Snot-Rag: But its my favorite show!
  • Hubbs (to Joe): Every band puts out at least one pussy song so they can find out who the faggots are!
  • Hubbs: I'd kick his ass if it wasn't for his massive upper body strength.
  • Hubbs: Information without transportation equals dick.
  • Hubbs: If it wasn't for you and this fag me and Joe would be having a tittie-fest right now!
  • Joe: ...You Think a chick's going to go for it just because you got some Ox 45?
Mike Dick: Hey, these are Talls, man
  • Joe: I thought your brother got popped for thrashing on that Samoan guy; you know with his steel tipped boots.
Crump: No, Man. He got out last week; the guy lived
  • Tack: Fuck you, you fucking worm!

[edit] See also

[edit] External links