User:Short Brigade Harvester Boris

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At meeting from Collective Farm Group these prizes was being awarded for outstanding accomplishment.

The milkmaid, Anastasia, is receiving the prize of a hen and a rooster for caring for her hen so efficiently. After the award was announced there was great applause and music.

It was then announced that Petrov, the stable boy, would get a new suit for having raised a very fine prize horse. There was tremendous applause and music in honor of this award then.

Finally it was announced that Short Brigade Harvester Boris, for harvesting 390% more than his quota of grain, for working seven days from a week, for his high political acumen, and for setting 17 records for other workers to emulate, would get a Grand Prize: a complete set of the works of Lenin.

There was no applause and no music.

From one corner of the large room could be heard the whisper of one peasant to another: "It serves him right!"

from the Firesign Theatre Dear Friends radio series, 11 October 1970

Alternate account of User:Raymond arritt