User:Nitro308

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Hi, my name is Bob Anderson. I grew up in Alabama, and, unfortunately, I still live there. I love my two cows bessy and daisy. They're the only ones in my life. My wife died in a milking accident. Long story. But bessy died Teusday. I don't know how I'll go on. She had toenail cancer, so there was nothing I could do but put her out of her misery. But the cool thing was its eyeballs popped out when I shot it. hehe.

Anyways, I ways out on a camping trip last wednesday. Well, I'll tell ya, we got lost, wadda ya know. Even though we were about 5 minutes away from a convient store. Well, it was gettin close to lunch time, and I didn't have anything to eat. Well, i could'nt eat the berries, cause I heard those get ya kinda blocked. But then I saw my friend jacob. He was looking kinda tasty at the moment. I mean, seriously, I had'nt eaten in at LEAST 4 hours. So, what the heck. I ate him. Big man's gotta have his meat every once in a while. I mean, don't get me wrong. This was a one time deal only.Except for the time I ate mark on that other camping trip, but that's another story. kinda, but its basically the same. Jacob tasted pretty good actually. But you gotta suck all the blood out first, or else it gets juicy. The Calves are the best part. But I ate all of him. And I mean ALL of him.except for the bones. When I got back to the camping site, my other buddies saw the blood on my mouth. ok, and the left arm I was holding. James asked me "Did you eat someone again Bob? I told you specifically not to, or we'd kick you out of Boy scouts. What is this, like, the 13th time this has happened? Learn your lesson already!" James is head scoutmaster, and I'm co-scoutmaster. Pretty nice guy until he has to go over my cannibalism issues with me. He actually nibbled one of my fingers off just to demonstrate how much it hurts. And trust me, it hurt. But I can't really break the habit. Well, gotta go, I got some more calves to bite into!