User:Matthew Flournoy

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Matthew A. Flournoy, born Kitten Snow Drift, is a little known writing genius. He has no published works, but has many works indeed. It is thought that his novel, yet extreme, ideas come from his recelection of his childhood, a majestic tale in itself.


[edit] Early Life

Matthew was born to an Albino Eskimo family off the coast of Alaska. When he was young, to escape death, his mother placed him in a basket and floated him down the coast to California, where he was soon taken to safety by Brian Wilson of the Beach Boys. Brian had no interest in keeping the child, so he put him up for addoption. After many weeks, Tumtum Pookiewookie Smith, a witch-doctor with very ancient wisdom, took Matthew to live with him in his tiki hut on the coast. There they lived for a very short while, until, inspired by a John Wayne movie, Tumtum decided to visit the State of Texas. So the two packed up and headed to the Lone Star State. Every thing was going great, but tragedy soon struck. Just after entering El Paso, Tumtum was so overwhelmed at the beauty of the state, he had a heart attack; Tumtum was near to the end. So, he called upon an old friend, Chupacabra, to take Matthew away. Chupacabra and Matthew road day and night, never stopping at any town until they got to Austin, the capital of Texas. Chupacabra and Matthew would have stayed here, but the disturbing burnt orange tint and oversized cow heads diturbed both Chupacabra and Matthew alike. They did not know how they would escape the dreadful charade. Just as Chupacabra thought he'd failed, he heard of a beautiful city beyond the orange tempest. A city of happiness and joy; a city of maroon and white. This city was none other than the legendary College Station. So the two made haste to the paradise city on Earth, charging swiftly out of the horrifying orange grasps. Soon, because of a wrong turn, they found themselves in Houston. It was here that Chupacabra felt the life leaving him, so he took the young companion to a small home in Houston, then went away to find some goat meat, but was soon shot down. The home were Matthew had been taken was none other than that of the Flournoy family. They felt that Matthew was a gift, so they named him 'Matthew', which means "Gift of God" in Hebrew, gift of God indeed.


[edit] From Kitty to Cat

As Matthew grew up, he realized he wasn't an athlete. During his ninth year of kindergarten, because every year seems the same, the other athletes, to make fun, named Matthew Cruise Cat, because no matter how much he tried, Matthew would only run one speed, walk. So they named him Cruise Cat, refering to a vehicle's cruise control. And so they laughed.


[edit] He Came From The Lightning

Several months after the "Cruise" occurence, Matthew found himself running with the athletes once again. As they began another sprint, something spectacular happened; he was actually sprinting! Yes they deserve to die, and I hope they burn in H**l. It was like he came from the lightning. Now he was the one laughing. He decided that, with this new speed, he needed a new name. So he called himself "Cruz Cat", just because the name looks fast.