User:JLHS87

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Jonathan Luke Saunders(born November 11, 1987) is an incredible human being. Born to Barry and Emilie Saunders, Luke was raised in a semi-surburban home in the West End of Henrico County. Henrico County is located outside Richmond, Virginia. Today, Luke continues to reside in Henrico County in pursuit of true happiness that he has yet to discover.

Early Life

As a child, Luke attended Tuckahoe Elementary School. While mastering the fundamentals, he also took part in recess sports as well as Seasonal Soccer at the Tuckahoe YMCA. Though their name changed every year, Luke's team went undefeated for 8 years. With house hold names such as Dylan Hoe, Stefan Kling, and Arturro Murillo, the crew was unstoppable. Luke was among several on his team to be recruited for the American World Cup Team. Unfortunately, Luke's father had other plans. As Luke's athletic abilities began to develop, his father, Barry, strongly encouraged the young soccer prodigy to give up the sport he loved and pursue swimming, a dull activity that Barry had participated in through out his youth. Reluctantly Luke agreed. Unfortunately, Elementary school came to a close and Luke continued on to the most awkward and depressing time of his life...middle school. The first two weeks of changing classes and block schedule at Tuckahoe Middle School, located not five minutes from Tuckahoe Elementary, were a breeze. Luke was making friends and enjoying education. However, soon after, the sixth grader discovered that he had an extreme case of bucked teeth and needed braces if he ever wanted to succeed in life. Another disappointment revealed itself when Luke never made it passed being a Soprano in Sixth Grade Chorus. He was taunted daily by the maturing alto, William Rousseau. They are enemies to this day. As for swimming, Luke began to develop into somewhat of a professional. Appearing in the 1996 and 2000 Summer Olympics for the 400 IM, Luke was becoming extremely renown in the sport. For a brief period, Luke and his father moved to California to train with the rising elite under 7 time gold medalist Mark Spitz. Too bad that enthusiasm wouldn't last.

High school

High school rolled around and Luke was beginning to regain the confidence he had in elementary school. Attending the prestigious Freeman high school, two years of braces and a quick transition through puberty had the girls all over Luke by Freshman year. Second Semester, he had a record setting, 65 girlfriends in one week. Eventually, Luke began to discover how God awful the sport of swimming was. He had no free time, his hair was turning green, and he constantly reeked of the sometimes deadly water sterilization agent, Chlorine. Finally, one day Luke got up the courage to challenge his father. He said, "I'm not going to practice." The attempt of defiance was denied and Luke cried for days on end. After weeks of moping, Luke finally got his opportunity to branch out, just in time for football season. Going into football lacking serious knowledge about the game was a terrible decision. As the dreaded two-a-days rolled around, Luke and co-rocker, Brien Carr, aka Viper, were completely blind sided. The black lipped brothers, stumbled through one season of Junior Varsity Football and never went back. The two had such a lack of talent that the wide receiver coach, Engalls, told Brien one day, "Man, you throw like a homo." After that experience, Luke made an attempt to return to swimming, however his work ethic had died and the once prominent swimmer was now a failure. After a mildly depressing sophomore year, Luke turned to friends Stefan Kling, Carter Neal, Chad Ebel, and Matt Clough for support. Josh Crowley, arrived from Boisse, Idaho later that year and the two became musical and illegal activity accomplices. St. Benedictian, Carter Neal, also took place in many of their missions. Luke began devoting more time to friends and fun and his grades junior year began to slip. Luke ended the year with a personal low .02 GPA. Freeman's central office is still trying to uncover the reason he was sent on to the 12th grade. Over the summer, Luke had a remarkable experience in the Compass Program out of Gordon College in Boston, Massachusetts. While there he met goof friends Brandon Styles and Tyler Pleasants. Tyler and Luke got married later that year. Brandon refused to attend the wedding. Senior year finally rolled, and Luke was determined to have a keg party every night. That goal has been met to this day. There is one tonight at 8501 Academy Rd. Everyone is invited. The year continued on and Luke procrastinated in every way possible, much similar to how he is avoiding preparation for a Government Test right now. Developing just before Christmas Break, Team Skull was born. Members included Eric Mclean, John Hatton, William Rousseau and Luke himself. Their most esteemed accomplishment was the creation of Hot Flash, a rubber band powered hotrod used in Ms. Casdorph’s Physics class. It was an overpowering force in the popularity contest, dominating School President Jenn Newsome’s Christmas Car. Second semester had finally come, and like all other Seniors, Luke was looking forward to the opportunity to slack off. Unfortunately, that would not happen because if he did not receive As and Bs on his report card, Luke would have to pay the Brunswick County Court for a 400 dollar speeding ticket he received while driving recklessly on route to Tyler Pleasants’ home.

Today

Presently, Luke is living at home with his parents and Labrador retriever, Lucy the Valient. He is finishing Senior and hoping to pursue a career in music. Collegiate possibilities include VCU, CNU, JMU, and Appalachian State University. The esteemed J. Sergeant Reynolds is also a possibility in Luke’s future. Luke is currently single, so if there are any women out there that think the whole desperate, writing a history about yourself, thing is sexy, then he is basically Brad Pitt. Bottom line, Luke will be famous in some way...so look out for him.