If I'm Dyin', I'm Lyin'

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“If I'm Dyin', I'm Lyin'”
Family Guy episode
Peter reveals Chris' fake illness.
Episode no.	Season 2 Episode 9
Written by	Chris Sheridan
Directed by	Swinton O. Scott III
Guest stars	Martin Mull, Peter Roth
Production no.	1ACX12
Original airdate	April 4, 2000
Season 2 episodes
Family Guy - Season 2 September 23, 1999 – August 1, 2000
Peter, Peter, Caviar Eater Holy Crap Da Boom Brian in Love Love Thy Trophy Death Is a Bitch The King Is Dead I Am Peter, Hear Me Roar If I'm Dyin', I'm Lyin' Running Mates A Picture Is Worth a 1,000 Bucks Fifteen Minutes of Shame Road to Rhode Island Let's Go to the Hop Dammit Janet! There's Something About Paulie He's Too Sexy for His Fat E. Peterbus Unum The Story on Page One Wasted Talent Fore Father

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List of Family Guy episodes

"If I'm Dyin', I'm Lyin'" is an episode from the FOX animated series Family Guy. It is the 16th episode of Family Guy, to be aired. It was produced for season one but aired in season two. It guest-starred Martin Mull as Mr. Harris, and Fred Tatasciore as Chevy Chase.

[edit] Plot summary

Chris has been failing school recently, and Lois forbids him from watching TV until his grades improve. Lois suggests to Peter that he help Chris with his study skills. This prompts Peter to lie to her about studying so that he and Chris can watch their favorite show, Gumbel 2 Gumbel, a crime drama starring brothers Bryant and Greg Gumbel. However, he is disappointed to discover that the show has been canceled. To get it back on the air, Peter decides to tell the Grant-a-Dream Foundation (a parody of the Make-a-Wish Foundation) that Chris is suffering from a made-up terminal illness called "tuma syphilisitisosis", the symptoms of which include growing extra nipples (actually pepperoni slices) across one's torso, and that being able to watch the show is his dying wish.

Because of this (and because everyone thinks the name of the disease is sexy) an agreement is brokered between Grant-a-Dream and NBC in which Gumbel 2 Gumbel will be put back on the air if NBC can get the film rights to Chris's death. Peter is overjoyed with Gumbel 2 Gumbel back on the air, and Chris uses his "illness" to his advantage in school. However, Peter panics upon learning that mourners are holding a candlelit vigil on their front lawn. When the network comes to claim their part of the deal, Lois finds out about the scam and tells Peter to tell the truth. However, he finds out that he would face prison time for defrauding a charitable organization if he does. Acting out of desperation, he casually claims to have cured him with newfound healing powers and gets off the hook.

Peter gets a reputation for being a healer, and people start worshiping him as a god, which he himself begins to believe; they even go as far as dressing like him and building a giant golden idol of him. Lois and Brian, however, continue to plead with Peter that he admit he is not God, lest he wants divine wrath bestowed upon him by the real God. It isn't long before God himself sends six plagues upon his house. First a blackout occurs in the Griffin house. Brian then gets covered with fleas. Chris comes down the stairs with pimples all over his face and while Meg was giving Stewie a bath, the bathtub water turned to blood. Peter believes that there is a logical explanation for everything until frogs start flying out of his shirt, upon which he finally decides to tell the truth. Though he admits he is not God and begs for forgiveness from the real God, Chris is crushed by the golden idol during the final plague (death of the firstborn son). Peter continues to beg for forgiveness until God, who knows by now that Peter really gets the point, finally ends the plagues and spares Chris' life.

[edit] Cultural references

Peter writes a letter to try and save the show Coach, referencing Craig T. Nelson in the letter.
In one scene, Hollywood Squares is parodied with its celebrity guests LL Cool J, Charles Grodin, Fran Drescher, Scott Bakula, Whoopi Goldberg, Suzanne Somers, Dennis Rodman and Betty White. The comical attitude of Hollywood Squares was caught in the episode too when the host asks the sick kid if there is anything lower than absolute zero, and he says "Uh, yeah, my white cell count." The sick kid, Jeremy, would later appear in the episodes "Mr. Saturday Knight" and "Stuck Together, Torn Apart."
A sign outside NBC's Studio reads "We Used to Have Seinfeld, Remember?"
In the NBC boardroom, one of the executives dismisses an idea as "the same crap over and over" and suggests that they "take a chance" and "do something fresh," to which the dissident is beaten with a Just Shoot Me! poster.
Peter’s black cousin Rufus Griffin had starred in many movies called Caddyblack, Blackdraft, and Black Kramer vs. Kramer. These are parodies of the movies Caddyshack, Backdraft, and Kramer vs Kramer, respectively (as well as a reference to Blaxploitation flims in general).
At one point, Peter apologizes to Chris, stating that "This isn't the first time my appetite's gotten me in trouble." The scene cuts to a parody of the film The Diary of Anne Frank during the Nazi infiltration of the house in which the Frank family (Anne, Margot, Mrs. and Ms. Frank), Van Daan Family (Mr. and Ms. Van Daan and Peter), Miep and Mr. Dussel was hiding. The clip suggests the reason the Franks were discovered was because Peter was hiding with them, eating potato chips obnoxiously loud.
In a cutaway, Back to the Future is spoofed with Peter’s black cousin, Rufus Griffin in a Blaxploitation film called Black to the Future. The De Lorean time machine, meeting up with his teenager mother, and performing at the school dance are spoofed in the scene. The Chuck Berry phone call during the dance is replaced with the band member calling Isaac Hayes instead. Rufus' character’s name in the movie is Marty McSuperfly, a blend of Marty McFly and Super Fly.
The popular 1970s sitcom Good Times is parodied in a scene where Florida Evans is upset that she's named after a U.S. State. J.J.'s famous "Dy-No-Mite" is also implemented.
After Chris shows signs of boils, one of the ten Plagues of Egypt, one of the names Peter said kids used to call him was "Rootin' Tootin' Raspberry." This is a reference to the popular Pillsbury Funny Face Drink flavor.
Stewie is excited when the bathtub water turns to blood, proclaiming, "It's as if someone stabbed Mr. Bubble!"
In the scene where Peter is pleading to God, he says "I'm just a big fake, like the Moon Landing, and Marky Mark's hog in Boogie Nights. And Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman--I don't mean that completely untrue gay rumor, they’re just both really phony." These are references to the Apollo Moon Landing hoax accusations, Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman's marriage (at the time of the episode’s original airing they were still married), and to the ending to Boogie Nights in which Wahlberg’s character Dirk Diggler pulls out his long penis.
When Chris is being crushed by the statue and claims he sees a light at the end of a tunnel, Peter and Lois warn him to stay away from the light, a reference to the line from Poltergeist.

[edit] Trivia

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The article could be improved by integrating relevant items and removing inappropriate ones.

In June 2003, Igor Smykov sued the Russian television channel REN TV on claims that Family Guy, along with The Simpsons, were "morally degenerate and promoted drugs, violence and homosexuality." As evidence, "If I'm Dyin', I'm Lyin'" was shown to the judge to prove that Family Guy showed a dysfunctional family, and thus should not be aired again on the channel. The case was thrown out after one day.[1]

[edit] References

S. Callaghan, “If I’m Dyin’, I’m Lyin’.” Family Guy: The Official Episode Guide Seasons 1–3. New York: HarperCollins, 2005. 74–77.
A. Delarte, “Nitpicking Family Guy: Season 2” in Bob’s Poetry Magazine, 2.May 2005: 15–16 http://bobspoetry.com/Bobs02My.pdf