Talk:İş Bank commercial featuring Atatürk

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İş Bank commercial featuring Atatürk was a good article nominee, but did not meet the good article criteria at the time. There are suggestions below for improving the article. Once these are addressed, the article can be renominated. Editors may also seek a reassessment of the decision if they believe there was a mistake.

Reviewed version: December 17, 2007


[edit] GA Status

The article has passed Sections 4) and 5). Work needs to be done on Sections 1), 2), 3) and 6).

Overall, the assessment is ON HOLD.

1) Style

Plot Section

  • Add, "Awe struck" before "the boy asks how,,,"
  • Replace "Shocked" with "Over-awed"
  • Put quotation marks around "whether he isn't Ataturk?"
  • Replace "still shocked" with "still in awe"

Production section

  • Put "black and white" in commas
  • Remove "itself"
  • Replace "made out of" with "made up of"
  • Replace "was acted by" with "was played by"
  • Replace "take" with "shoot"
  • Replace "agreement concluded with" with "agreed upon"
  • Remove "had"

Reception section

  • No contractions allowed in Wikipedia, other than in direct quotes, replace "wasn't"

2) Accuracy

Infobox

  • Gürkan Kurtkaya
  • Hakan Büyüktopçu

are all non-existent links.

Plot Section

  • Expound on the meaning of the "lesson". There will be some readers who will not understand that Ataturk means that achievement requires hard work and pain. Make the meaning of the "lesson" clear.

Production section

  • Gürkan Kurtkaya
  • Rıdvan Akar
  • Hakan Büyüktopçu
  • Vittorio Sodano
  • Suzan Kardeş
  • Nalan Türkoğlu
  • Paşabahçe

are all non-existent links.

References section

  • Haber Türk
  • Akşam

are all non-existent links.

3) Coverage

Introduction

  • Expand the Introduction, include a reference on how the commercial was received by the Turkish media. Add a paragraph on how Ataturk has been depicted in the Turkish media since his death. You have to make the case why this commercial is notable. See WP:Lead. Is this commercial a break in tradition in the way Ataturk has been portrayed in Turkey ?

Production Section

  • Who is Ridvan Akar ? and why was he specifically consulted ?

Reception section

  • Expand Reception. How has Turkish media reacted to this commercial ? Have there been any commentaries, debates ? How have İş Bank's customers' reacted to the commercial ?

4) Neutrality

Article is neutral in tone.

5) Stability

Article is stable. No major edit wars.

6) Photos

A Fair Use screenshot is used, however, the Fair Use Template is not. Rewrite Fair Use rationale using the template : Template:Non-free use rationale.

The corrections, as specified above, must be done by 17 December 2007. Contact me when they have been and I shall re-assess.

Tovojolo (talk) 21:07, 10 December 2007 (UTC)


[edit] GA Status Fail

I note that the work, that was required to achieve GA Status, was not done. I, therefore, have no alternative but to declare that the article has now been assessed as a FAIL

Tovojolo (talk) 00:04, 17 December 2007 (UTC)