Talk:First Battle of the Stronghold
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This article was added to Brilliant prose on December 30, 2003.
Discussion from Wikipedia:Brilliant prose candidates
- First Battle of the Stronghold - My first attempt to flesh out some of the events of the Indian Wars, and I think it turned out pretty well. Gentgeen 14:54, 15 Dec 2003 (UTC)
- Seconded. Good topic, well-done, nice use of pix. -- BCorr ¤ Брайен 17:01, 15 Dec 2003 (UTC)
- Very well-written, nice-looking and complete. However, before it becomes 'brilliant prose' it needs a full set of references in a ==References== section and a ==Further reading== section for good books on the subject. The lead paragraph also needs to be a short summary of the entire article. The reason this is important is because Wikipedia is an encyclopedia of encyclopedias and one of those encyclopedias is a concise one. Having a comprehensive lead paragraph(s) accomplishes this (not too long, however). See news style. The photo caption is also wrong; the Army fortifications in the photo are inside the Stronghold and, IIRC, were built after the second battle when the Army took the Stronghold over. I suggest replacing that photo with others that show Modoc-built defensive or offensive positions (or even caves they were living-in). --mav 01:10, 17 Dec 2003 (UTC)
- Thanks mav, I've expanded the intro paragraph, added refrences, and replaced the offending pic with another one (also yours) showing Captain Jack's cave, although I liked the first, just to show the rough terrain. Gentgeen 11:55, 17 Dec 2003 (UTC)
- Looks real good! I withdraw my objection. --mav
- Thanks mav, I've expanded the intro paragraph, added refrences, and replaced the offending pic with another one (also yours) showing Captain Jack's cave, although I liked the first, just to show the rough terrain. Gentgeen 11:55, 17 Dec 2003 (UTC)
[edit] Not really FA
This needs a map, wikificaton of the second section (ilinks), expantion and inline citations. Otherwise this is headign towards FARC...--Piotr Konieczny aka Prokonsul Piotrus Talk 17:21, 11 May 2006 (UTC)

